Doghouse Bastards Forums

Ok, we all need a good giggle to see us through the day.. so how about we share our jokes on here!

I'll start shall I?





What's funnier than a female comedian?

Everything.

Why did the polish man cross the road?

Because he'd stolen the chickens job.

1 sperm has 37.5MB of DNA information in it.

That means a normal ejaculation represents a data transfer of 1403808.59375 GB in about 3 seconds.

And you thought virgin broadband was fast!!

I was chatting up a girl in a bar when she suddenly said "don't bother. I wouldn't fuck you if you were the last person on earth", to which I replied, "if I was the last person on earth, who would be around to stop me?". That shut her up.

Not bad MC! And I like the priorities list in your sig

ta, but most of my best are just nicked from sickipedia.

A female friend was complaining to me the other day. She said it was wrong that if a guy slept with a different girl every night, hes a legend, but if a girl sleeps with a different guy every night, shes a slut. So i explained it to her like this: if a key opens a lot of locks, then its a master key, but if a lock can be opened by a lot of keys, then its crap lock.



cheers im gunnae make a graphic sig with the same on soon. Perhaps a t shirt... And a bumper sticker... And a tattoo, but for that i may shorten it to just "push forbes down stairs". I dont like getting large tats.

MC x

MC ...

That is an excellent analargy... I will have to remember that one !!

It is a cracker! Used that one myself a good few times to a tepid response!

Two prostitutes were talking about how rough times were.
One said, "You know, times are so bad that I did a trick last night for five measly pounds, just so I had the taxi fare home!"
"Huh," replied the other slag, "I gave away a blowjob last night just to get something warm in my stomach!"

Whats the best thing about shagging twenty eight year olds?

Theres twenty of them!