Hello Bastardos,
FML! I've just bought some red Tartan Dr Martins on eBay! I was pissed on lots of Rum but it would take a special kind of mong to do this especially as I'm English... I'm happy to donate them to the DHB so maybe you can auction them and make a few quid for new equipment. Perhaps no cunt but me would buy them but they're yours if you want them.
Mark.